1. We didn't consult enough to discover that they just meant the silly hat.
2. We haven't yet figured out the sword thing, but it seems important to people, so maybe they can carry it like a ladies umbrella.
3. We want to send the message that liturgical events are not as important as civic events and social work.
4. If you care at all about the uniform, then you must not care about more important things.
5. Our pals said they liked it, which is why we didn't think anyone would have an issue (but just to be on the safe side, we kept it a secret until we could announce it as a fait accompli).
6. We think that, now is a perfectly good time in history to proclaim to the world that patriotism is best manifested via country-club militarism.
7. Our understanding of iconography is of things you drag and drop.
8. We, with an average age of 65, decided that the new uniforms are what guys in their 20s would like to wear.